Things That Have Made Their Way To Your Mouth:

A bottle. A binky.

A blue teething ring.

Your big right toe.

The straps on your swing.

Your fingers. Your thumbs.

A banana (just half).

A small pink spoon.

A rubber giraffe.

Your jammies. Your hat.

A clump of Mom’s hair.

A Tupperware lid.

A teaspoon of pear.

But we're not concerned -

It's a source of great pride...

That you approach life

With your mouth open wide.

Oh, I Give Up

Dear Laney,

Apparently, you want to skip the part of your development where somebody else feeds you, and skip right to the part where you feed yourself.

Fine.

Gus, you can bat clean up.

Love,

Mom

Good Morning To You. I Live In a Zoo.

Dear Laney,

I am starting to suspect that you are 95% beautiful baby and 5% howler monkey.

click here

But you're my favorite good morning monkey.

Love,

Mom

Hamtastic

Dear Laney,

Every day, you're becoming more of a little grown-up - which is great - but it doesn't mean I'm not going to miss so many things about your little baby body.

In fact, if I had to pick the thing I'll miss the most, it would be your feet. They are pink and perfect and deliciously chubby. I say "delicious," because they look like little hams. I could put them between two slices of bread and eat them up.

But instead, I settle for kissing them 8000 times a day. Hope you don't mind.

Love,

Mom

Cheese Fries, Please

Dear Laney,

Tonight, we had dinner at Outback Steakhouse with your Aunt Brynn and Uncle Nate.

I had the crab cakes. You had four pacifiers, two teething toys, a box of crayons, our undivided attention, three teaspoons of sweet potatoes, a crying jag, and a walk around the parking lot with Nate.

I took you to the bathroom for a diaper change and while you were crying, a 3 year old girl walked in and asked you, "WHAT HAPPENED?!?"

Preach, sister.

Love,

Mom

Laney & Sophie

Dear Laney,

Here is something I shouldn't admit to you...in fact, if you ever ask me about it, I'll deny I ever wrote it, but here goes: When you don't feel good, I'm willing to throw money at the problem.

This is why you're now in possession of an $18 specially-formulated rubber giraffe from a small factory in France. Sophie the Teething Giraffe even has a little squeaker inside her, and she makes Ella NUTS. But you love her, and that's what's important.

In fact, if you could talk, I bet you'd say "Hey, Mom, thanks for going out of your way to find me such an AWESOME teething toy."

And I bet if Sophie could talk, she'd say "Ow! Quit chewing on my leg! That HURTS!"

Just kidding.

Love,

Mom

Your Big Round Head: Full Disclosure

Dear Laney,

When I wrote yesterday that your round head was my fault, you were only getting half the story. I got MY round head from my father, so really you should blame him. Or thank him, because you're awfully cute.

My grandmother (Philip's mother) was called "Mama Lee," and she had this photo of Philip hanging up in her front room for decades. Mama Lee was quite a character, and I hate you won't get to meet her. When we were little and our parents did something we didn't like, my cousin Heidi and I could tattle to Mama Lee, and she would head off to give them a spanking with her little cutting board, even though they were in their forties.

Mama Lee wasn't big on hygiene, but her food was so good no one cared. To this day, when I smell chicken grease, I get nostalgic for Mama Lee's kitchen.

After my parents got married, Mama Lee would ask Peg all the time, "When are you going to have a baby?" And Peg would say "As soon as you take down that picture of Philip with the huge head." Mama Lee never took down the picture, and Peg eventually had me anyway...

So that I could grow up and have you...

and pass on the tradition of the big Lee head.

You're welcome.

Love,

Mom