Y'all Hush: The Warm-Up Period

Hey, y'all -

It stinks that your dad's not here. The only thing I could think of that would stink more is if I told you we're not going to do all the fun things we usually do, just because your dad isn't here. So we've had some talks about being flexible and cooperative and working together so we can still go on outdoor adventures now that there's only one grown-up in the house.

Scratch that.

LANEY and I have had some talks about working together while Hagen stares off in the distance, because he couldn't give two toots about going outside ever. But that's okay. I've got his number.

Yesterday, we went sledding. Before the car was even in park, Laney grabbed her plastic sled and ran across the street to the top of the sledding hill and wasn't seen again for half an hour. I spent that 30 minutes getting Hagen into his snow pants and hat and gloves and coat while he yelled things like "WHY ARE WE EVEN HERE WHEN WE COULD JUST GO TO THE Y?!?" The Kid Room at the Y is Hagen's favorite place in the world, because it has buckets of Transformers just waiting to be sorted in a temperature-controlled room. Also: a ball pit.

But it wouldn't be fair to Laney who loves to "do stuff" if we spent every minute at the Y, so DAMMIT PUT ON THESE PANTS. This was - obviously - not my first Hagen rodeo. So here's what I did (judge me if you will, dear reader - I don't care):

I bundled him up, put him on a dry sled, wrapped him in extra coats, and gave him my iPhone to watch a few episodes of Dinobots, parked his butt in the corner, and ignored him.

One thing I will say about you, though, Hagen, is that you don't care one bit that all your best snow gear is pink and purple, courtesy of your older sister's hand-me-downs. Usually, I tell you something like "Wow! that's the same color as that Pokemon you love with all the combat power!" and you love it. But the hat: that's all you. Out of everything at REI, you picked that one. No one to blame but yourself.

Anyway... parked Hagen in the corner of the field and went off to watch Laney do her thing times a thousand, laughing all the way (ho, ho, ho) -

Laney, you're just so cool and fearless and fun and an absolute joy to watch.

When Laney decided to walk over to a steeper hill on the far side of the sledding area, I dragged Hagen in his sled so I could keep him close. That's when he started to come around to the idea of being outside in the snow. While I was watching Laney and her friends, Hagen got up out of the sled and started hiking to the horizon. I caught up with him way across the field and asked what he was up to. "This just seemed like the kind of thing Moana would do...go far away on an adventure."

Hagen, I led you back to our group, and asked, 'Before we leave, would you like to try sledding...just once?" "Sure!" you smiled. "I've always wanted to know what sledding is like!"

Me: "NO YOU HAVEN'T, YOU BIG LIAR!"

(Note to self: saying something like that to your child in front of a group of people who didn't also witness the breakdown in the car at the mere mention of outdoor activity makes YOU look like the bad guy.)

OF COURSE you loved it, and while everyone else was packing up and leaving, we stayed extra so you could sled your heart out.