The Best Table In Town

Dear Laney,

Yesterday was Valentine's Day, but more importantly, it was Somersault School day. I drove you into town and walked you into the gym and had just finished taking off your shoes when you sauntered up to a table full of waiting parents and kids and hollered, "HI GUYS! WHAT'S EVER-BODY DOING?" The parents all laughed and one lady answered, "Not much. What are YOU doing?" And you gestured, "Well, this is my mommy..." It's the first time I've ever been introduced to a group of strangers by a two year-old, and I have to say I enjoyed it immensely.

Your dad joined us and was your parent coach for the day. When the class was over, I asked him how you did. He said something like, "Well, there are a few things she's interested in, and those she can knock out of the park, but if she's not interested in something, she doesn't apply herself at all." I said, "I don't know if you're telling me how Laney did, of if you're just going a dramatic reenactment of every report card I ever received."

When I called Peg Peg on the way home to tell her this story, she started to laugh knowingly before I even got to the punchline. Sometimes, mothers can be so irritating.

We all went out for cheeseburgers at Wendy's after your class. Your dad and I never go out for fast food, but almost immediately, we recognized its appeal. We had a booth by the bathroom far away from everyone else. You could scream, holler and act a fool and no one would give us the side eye, because the Wendy's demographic has very low expectations when it comes to their dining environment. And free balloons!

Mom: Ok, we're going to start eating here every day.

Dad: I'll be 700 pounds.

Mom: I don't care. I don't have to worry about my children's behavior and hey - free balloons!

Three years ago, your dad and I celebrated Valentine's Day by going to a ridiculously expensive swanky dinner in our going-out clothes. Two years ago, we went to Spokane for the weekend and had a nice low-key dinner in our comfy pants. Last year, your dad brought home a cake and we exchanged gifts in the living room. This year, we had junior bacon cheeseburgers and went to bed at 8:30p. At this rate, I look forward to next Valentine's Day when we'll share a pecan log in the parking lot of the truck stop off Exit 99.

And that'll be just fine by me.

Love,

Mom