Loud And Clear

Hey y'all,

There has been a lot of whining and general grumpiness in our house lately, and it's been coming from the adults. At the risk of airing our business in public, this has been a very difficult few months for us financially. The show I was working on got cancelled, and Hagen's hospital bills, our car registration, our income tax and Laney's school enrollment fee were all due in the same few weeks. Your dad and I weren't adjusting well to being poor, and it made us short-tempered and irritable.

On Monday afternoon, I picked Laney up from school and took her to ride on the carousel. As we were about to climb on a horse for the third time, a local after-school program for special needs kids and their parents showed up. There was a girl who looked to be about ten years old who got on the horse behind us, and was so happy to be there that she could only vent her excitement by wildly waving her arms in the air and screaming. And the whole time, this little girl's mother stood next to her, smiling and helping her daughter get her safety belt on. As Laney stared at the girl making the noise, I looked at her mother and wondered how she does it - day in , day out - and still manages to stand on that carousel and smile. And I immediately felt so petty for every time I'd been so exasperated in the past few weeks that I've hollered at Laney for not brushing her teeth or not giving up her pacifier or not staying in her bed.

As if God was concerned that I hadn't quite gotten the message, I got a second reminder at the library, where we stopped after the carousel. Walking past the computer lab, we passed a young man in his 20s who appeared homeless. His clothes were dirty, and he had a huge pack on his back with a bedroll. He was waiting for someone to come out of the computer lab... and that man was pushing a stroller, holding a baby no bigger than Hagen.

I get it.

We have friends and family who support us, we have a roof over our head, and our children are absolutely healthy. Everything else is inconsequential, and if I'm actually complaining about what we have, I must be out of my mind.

I hear you, Universe...

Loud and clear.

Love,

Mom